Cloudy and gray,
just in case you wanted to know.
Quiet Sunday ahead.
Food shopping, a visit to the green market and a walk by the river with a new friend.
I had a busy week,
people were strange, preoccupied and not quite on.
Next week is bound to be different.
I have been reading , writing and sleeping sporadically all week.
I had a major discussion the other day in the bookstore.
Ever feel like you are a Martian when you hear people speak on some subjects?
One of my friends, she knows who she is,
would say being a Martian is a good thing,
Stranger In A Strange Land and all, but,
sometimes it’s lonely as well.
Anyway, the discussion,
The topic was finding a potential mate, lover, whatever, via Internet dating services.
One of the girls was saying,
that it’s really hard to find someone with whom you connect
on an intellectual basis.
I replied, of course it is your basing everything on a picture and a paragraph description.
Physical attraction rarely indicates intellectual and emotional compatibility.
At least that’s what I think.
This other woman who was in the bookstore said that to her,
physical attractiveness was everything.
If she doesn’t find a man attractive and envisions sleeping with him in the near future,
there is no possible relationship.
I said but, that’s just physical,
how do you know if he’s funny or smart or kind.
This woman says that physical tells you about lifestyle and compatibility.
So, here’s where I feel like a Martian,
to me physical attraction grows with how
smart, interesting and kind a person is.
Obviously, there can be no repugnance factor, but,
really it grows.
A friend says that’s why I never get laid,
I have to know someone for months, sometimes years.
Honestly, I think my method is flawed,
I have built relationships that I felt were
destined to work and they haven’t ,
so maybe the physical thing is most important.
But, I don’t think so.
What do you guys think?
Henry James a writer who I’m not really fond of, had a great quote:
“There are 3 things in life that are important;
the 1st is to be kind, the 2nd is to be kind
and the 3rd is to be kind”
Sex is an important, almost essential, part of life but,
someone who makes you think, laugh,
who never bores you and,
who is kind to children, old people and animals,
that’s what I’m looking for.
I’ll keep plugging away.
Thanks for putting up with my midlife crisis ramblings.