I Give Thanks

Good morning every one,

hope you are well.

It’s grey and raining,

here in my beautiful ugly.

Just had a meeting/walk,

with my friend, Jenna.

So grateful for friends,

and community.

Yesterday, I had,

a regular work day.

Feels good to be back,

to some sense of normalcy.

I love the work I do,

the muscles it works,

the skills it requires,

but, most of all,

the difference it makes.

I had a lot of,

hard stuff,

to do,

in the past few weeks.

Most of it was,

for me,

to deal with.

My mother left her papers,

in order.

Things were time consuming,

and it’s hard to concentrate,

when you are tired,

and grieving,

but, I got it done,

with so much help,

from my friends,

I was cared for,

cooked for,

looked in on,

enveloped in love.

I was prayed for,

I was the recipient,

of such largesse,

I asked a few people,

to do things,

no one said,

No.

No one would accept money,

they all did it,

out of the goodness,

of their heart,

and said they were honoured,

to help in whatever way they could.

I have friends,

loving and generous friends,

who have always been there.

I also have the privilege,

of being a part of three,

church communities,

my former church,

St-Jax’s.

My present church,

Church of the Epiphany,

and the Supper Club,

community.

All three have given me,

so much,

the service, the music,

the recording of the funeral,

the emotional support,

the shoulders, and ears,

the food,

so much,

delicious and nutritious food.

In a time of covid,

where we cannot,

hug, touch,

each other,

I have been given so,

many hugs,

by so many wonderful,

people,

my atheist friends,

my humanist friends,

my Christian friends.

I have been hugged,

I have been held,

loved,

with chicken soup,

borscht,

casseroles,

pasta,

chicken parm,

sourdough bread,

oven ready chicken breasts,

hampers of food,

breakfast, lunch and supper,

vouchers and tabs,

I have been invited over for,

homecooked food,

comforting and nutritious.

I have received hundreds of,

calls, emails, texts, cards,

flowers, plants,

donations made,

in mom’s memory,

touching and spontaneous,

tributes.

One of the last things my mom,

said to me,

‘I know you will be ok, you are loved’

I give thanks for every last person,

who has held me up,

loved me, cared for me,

kept me in their thoughts,

listened to me go on,

kept me in their prayers.

Losing my mother,

is so hard.

But, this love has been,

a balm on my heart.

And now, I am ok.

I will keep grieving,

I will keep missing mom,

but, I will keep moving,

this is a new part of my life,

all the previous parts,

and the wonderful people,

who contributed to helping,

me to be me,

walk with me,

they are a part of me,

and one of the biggest parts,

is the living memory,

of a little woman,

named,

Marthe.

I know she rests in peace.

Thank you all.

Be well,

stay safe,

wear your masks.

Later girls,

BB

Author: Bookish Butch

I am a bookish butch in my mid early fifties. I live in Montréal and always have. I used to run a small used bookstore. Reading keeps me sane. My latest jiggie is photography, book project in the works, living the dream

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