It’s raining and grey,

that’s the down side of Autumn.


I’m siting at my desk,

which has a view of the Birch tree across the street.

The tree’s leaves are Yellow with a tinge of Orange.

My cat, The Dude, is sitting on the windowsill ,

his head in profile,

 he appears to be the same colour.

Even at his advancing age,

he’s eleven,

 he is still interested in birds and squirrels.

He and I have lived together for eight years now.

He is a sweet beast and a good friend.

I believe I have never mentioned him before,

a grave oversight,

he is an important part of my life.


 or dogs,

if you are so inclined,

make life better, smoother.

I think it has a lot to do with unconditional love.

When the world is picking on you,

you walk in the door,

 and your four pawed friend,

is glad to see you.

You can’t beat that.

Moving on,

before you all think I have become some sort of,

strange cat lady.

Last week,

 this lovely man who comes to my store,

spoke to me about this,

 It Gets Better project.

I’m sure most of you have heard about it.

It was news to me.

After a well publicised rash of gay teen suicides,

brought on by bullying,

this project was created.



gay and straight and all things in between,

record videos where they tell teens,

 that it will,

 Get Better,

 that they will survive.

That eventually you find community,

that time and patience,

makes things better.

I may be over simplifying but,

you get the gist,


I applaud the effort.

I think it comes from a good place.

Reaching young people through,

You Tube and all is a no brainer,

many of them spend their lives in front of screens.

So, nothing wrong,

 with virtual role models and comfort.

When I was a teenager,

 movies and books had a big influence.

Watching, Desert Hearts,

 in which two women made love to each other,

and nobody died,

like in most previous dyke movies.

That was a seminal experience.

My parents being marginal people in their own way,

always expressed people’s right to difference.

Being Gay was fine,

different and more difficult,

but OK.

I know they worried,

 about my happiness, about my choice,

and what loving parent wouldn’t?

Of course,

 it was never a choice,

I was born,


I have read a lot of criticism of this project.

About how it oversimplifies the problem etc.

That familial homophobia,

 and society’s judgment of sexual minorities won’t go away,

as a result of well meaning celebrity video interventions.

Probably not, but,

it sure doesn’t hurt.

None of society’s ills and injustices,

 are rectified through one thing.

But, many little things,

 become the building blocks of change.

If this project,

 can help teens to see that being different,

 is not wrong,

just different,



Later girls



One thought on “%1$s”

  1. Aw, The Dude is a great name for a cat! I’m jealous, I was never allowed a cat growing up, now I can’t wait to get one.

    I kind of agree with some of the criticisms of the It Gets Better thing, but I do think that one of the good things about it is that it encourages kids to dream and hope. Knowing that I could get out of my crummy family and hometown helped a lot when I was a teenager.

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