Is it really an element of butch style?

The lovely weather lady,

on radio canada,

Josiane, be still my heart.

said the snowstorm,

would bypass,

the metropolitan area.

She was wrong,

looks like at least,

twenty centimeters,


it’s still coming down.

I don’t care,

it’s my day off,

not much on the schedule.


must be frustrating,

to have a job,

that involves,

years of study,

where you seem,

to be wrong,

most of the time:-)

I finished,

Giovanni’s Room,

I’ll wait,

a few days to review.

I’m still absorbing.

It is a short novel,

hard to discuss,

without giving too much,


I’m in a light mood,



that means,

Elements Of Butch Style.

Since spring is coming,

I will soon,

be reinstating my,

baseball caps,

so expect something,

on that,

pretty soon.


as there is,

no Spring,

on the horizon,

I wanted to write,

about an intimate layer,

of butchdom?

of butchness?

I hear you thinking out loud, perhaps even, freaking. How much more intimate can you get than a discussion on boxers?

The most intimate layer,

there is,

worn directly on the skin,









I think you all,

know by now,

that I am,

an olfactory butch,

the sweet smell,

of a woman,

is important to me.

I don’t mean,



I mean sweet,



could be soap.

Hard to describe, but, I know it when I smell it

Scent is important to me,




I want a woman,

to think,

I smell good,

even better if,

I can get a,

God, you smell wonderful.

This extension of my personality,

has evolved over the years.

When I was a young,

butch on the prowl,

I used to wear this,

Calvin Klein men’s cologne,

it was musky and sexy,



not too subtle,

a little bit,


butch 1980’s style,

worn under a big loose,


it was,


More with straight girls,

ah! butches and straight girls, dangerous, mine filled territory, I won’t go there!!


I wanted to attract lesbians,

still do!!

here’s where it gets,


how do you smell like,

a woman,

and not smell like the woman,

you seek.

I wear a unisex scent,

to me it is neither,




it’s both,

it’s butch:-)

A little citrus,

a little basil,

a little fern,

it’s nice.

I know some butches,

who wear nothing,


shower gel,

you know Lever 2ooo,

type stuff,

I sometimes go that,



I do light verbena and lime,

again clean and subtle.

But, I remain convinced,

that the woman I seek,

wants her butch,

to smell like one.

Again, I’m single so my expertise is definetly in question

what do you girls think,

Am I being silly,

or does scent matter?

is it really an element of your butch’s style?

Later girls,


Mussings on the butchness of beer

Another bright day.

I’m going out,


for a couple of beers,

with a friend.

I love beer,

I only drink it socially.

I don’t drink alone,

it’s not a rule,

or anything,

I just don’t.

I started drinking beer,

in my misspent youth,

it suits me,

not too strong,

not too expensive,

you’ve got to drink,

a lot of beer,

to pass out,

not so with,



Although, a Margarita is a beautiful thing, smooth, deceptively so,  knocks you on your ass, the femme of drinks??

Beer is also,

let’s face it,


Don’t get me wrong,

I know a lot of butches,

who drink,

the hard stuff,

and another bunch,

who drink,

sparkling water!!

so, so wrong.



is the ultimate,

butch drink.

Ok, picture this, in your mind’s eye, your sitting at the bar, in your favourite, bar. A handsome butch is walking towards you, she’s sporting a smile that makes you weak, and …. she’s carrying an umbrela drink in her hand…. Does that work for you? I didn’t think so! Unless, of course, she’s bringing it to you..and even then.


is a drink,

for the,

hard working,

the hard playing,

smoky bars,

with loud music,

for a simpler,



femmes were femmes,


butches were butches.


A nostalgic drink,

a virile drink.

A drink for a time that,

never was,

that you remember,

so clearly.

I figure I like beer,


I’ve acquired a taste for it,

or I have a genetic disposition.

I like beer,

like I like,




Over the years,

it’s made me brave,

and stupid,

with women.


bookish butch,


silly butch.

Silly is essential,

once in a while.

Don’t you think?

Btw, I’m reading this,

Best Of Lesbian Erotica,


in the next post,

I’m going to talk about it,



I want to know what you find,


and if you show me yours,

I’ll show you mine:-)

Later girls,


Butch hair

Had a lovely day today,

brunch with some good friends,

and dinner with some more.

Two wonderful meals,

prepared lovingly,

by someone else.

Since, I was out being social,

I missed the Heritage Classic,

an outdoor hockey game,

between two Canadian teams.

This year my Habs were playing,

The Calgary Flames,

I’m glad I didn’t watch,

The Habs lost 4-0,


got their butts handed to them.

I’ll admit it,

I’m shallow that way,

I like my team to win.

Also, I’m a bit of a bad loser,

in my personal life,

I mean, 

recently a woman asked me,

if I was competitive,

I replied “not really, I just like to win”.

I’m thinking it’s an only child thing:-)

I’m trying to read James Baldwin’s,

Giovanni’s Room,

for the GLBTQ Challenge,

it is of course masterfully written,

it’s Baldwin,

but, it’s another dark book.

February has been dark book month.

I’m taking a break.

So, tonight,

I thought,

I would do an installment,


The Elements of Butch Style.


I feel good and it makes me happy.

Hair, butch hair.

One of the few things,

I am vain about is,

my hair.

It used to be,

espresso brown,

dark, very dark,

almost black.

In the last few years,

it has lightened,

through no chemical help,

perish the thought, no self respecting butch, in my opinion, would dye their hair.

It has lightened on it own,

and it isn’t sun bleached,

never an abundance of sunshine,

in the Great White North,

it has lightened because some snow,

has appeared on the roof top,

it is,

slowly ,

turning gray.


have I considered colouring it,


I do wonder what it will look like,

when it’s Silver.

Maybe I’ll become, the silver bookish butch, hum, nice sound to that.

I am proud to say,

I have never had a mullet.

I will never live the embarasement,


a lover discovering a picture,

of a 1980’s mullet,

there are a few,

of an ill-advised perm,


not many,

and I was sixteen,

after all:-)

Some butches,

are very attached to their hair product,

that’s cool, I don’t judge.


not me,

no gel, no mouse,

the natural look.

I have it cut every 4 or 5 weeks,

so it’s always perfect,

the first week it’s crisp and boyish,

the fifth it’s shaggy,

in between,

just right.

Goldilocks and the 3 Bears, anyone?

In reality,

my hair is not butch,

in an obvious way,

no buzz cut, no droppy fringe.

What is butch about it,

is it’s unaffected air,

takes work to acheive that,

my friends,

tons of types of shampoo,

and conditionner,

nourishing and free drying.

Just long enough for a woman,

to run her fingers through it and say,

“It’s so soft”,

I live for those moments **sigh**

and short enough for her not to confuse,

me with the femmes,


usually the boots and flannel,

establish that.

So, butch hair?

Not too long, not too short,

soft and unaffected.

Works for me.

How do you like your butch to wear her hair?

Or do you even care?

Later girls,


Boxers or Briefs?

I’m feeling low and hormonal,

hapless and unloved,

woe is me

and whenever I feel this way,

the one thing,

that always brings me out of my funk?

An installment of,

The Elements of Butch Style,

can I have a drum roll, please.

Now, let’s see I’ve done,





Basic black,



baseball caps?



today we discuss,

that age old question,

Boxers or briefs?


I’m a boxer butch.

I like the comfort,

I like the line,


I mean, 

the no line:-)

When I was a young and studly butch,

all those years ago,


I used to wear briefs,

Calvin klein’s,

remember those?

They made me feel,

like I could conquer anything,

and woo,

any and all women.

My Calvins and my 501’s,

oh yeah,

I was dangerous.

Then I settled down,

and although my butt,

didn’t really grow,

my gut,


So I started,

sniffing around,

the boxer section,

at The Gap and all.

I never even considered women’s boxers,

those are for femmes,

who are getting in touch with,

their inner butch.

My butch is both inner and outer,


I explored boxers,

I didn’t really like the regular,

cotton or oxford types,

they bunch under,

my jeans.

But, the cotton jersey,

t-shirt like material,

that I liked.

In the last few years,

I suspect a lot more women,

of every type,

 have been purchasing,


and I suspect they aren’t all,

buying them for their boyfriends.

So, now we have much more,

of the smooth front types.

I hate those sides openings.

You get a rainbow of colours,

and cute affordable styles.

Perhaps, we can attribute this,

to post modernist gender interpretation?

Huhm, food for thought.

I like boxers,

most butches I know,

like boxers.

What do you think?

Which is butchier?

Or sexier?

Ok, Gina Gershon in Bound,

made tighty whitties,

very appealing,


that’s a movie,

in real life?

what do you think?

I’m feeling a little self-conscious with all,

this underwear talk,


Later girls,


A sociological question, for purely unscientific reasons.

I try not to care I would lose my mind
Running ’round the same thing time after time
Only two things bound to soothe my soul
Cold beer and remote control – Cold Beer And Remote Control-Indigo Girls

Yes, I love The Indigo Girls,

what do you expect?

I’m a butch,

in her forties,

no brainer:-)

My one point of originality is that neither,

Closer to Fine,



are my favourites.

My favourites are Shame On You,


Cold Beer and Remote Control.

Shame On You, because it’s a danceable tune,

and it has this line

the beautiful ladies walk on by,

You know I never know what to say

Butch, tongue tied ness,

 in a nut shell:-)

As for danceability,

only in my mind,


only in my mind.

Cold Beer and Remote Control,

appeals to my sense of,

working class.

Although, strictly speaking,

I’m not working class,

I am.

I’m a working stiff,

through and through,

I wear the clothes,

I listen to the tunes,

I wear that label.

I know that in a postmodern world,

labels are a no no,

but hey,

I don’t care,

I’m a rebel!!

Not really,


I am comfortable with my labels,

and I’m comfortable with people who don’t  wear them.

Mine, I know,

Butch with a capital B.

It seems there may still be a few femmes out there,

who appreciate butch.

Bless them!!

I asked a friend of mine,

a busy writer type,

what she saw as butch,

and what she liked about it.

She hasn’t gotten back to me about it,

I don’t think she’s avoiding,

she’s damn busy.

So, I thought I would ask you girls,

tell me what you like about butch,

it’s a sort of  a sociological study,

for strictly selfish purposes,

I’m counting on you.

Also, this same friend doesn’t like the term,


can anyone suggest an alternative?

What’s wrong with femme?

It’s just woman in French,

I like femme,

I like French,

I like to…

Oh no,

 I won’t go there:-)



really doesn’t do it for me,


that’s me.

Not, much reading lately,

that’s why you have been subjected to my,

 États D’ames.

I’m working on it,

I just have trouble concentrating,


Later girls,


Solicitude, the Butch position.

Lately, I have been feeling good about myself,

not just keeping up a good front,

 or being PR for customers,

genuinely good.

It’s as if,

years of waiting for life to happen,

or the mad dash to live everything in a few months,

had settled down.

A switch was hit on January 1 st ,

and the confidence of my youth,




I don’t know.

Maybe my mind was working it out,

 while I slept:-)

I have hopes and dreams, again.

I am me again,

with a vengeance:-)

That doesn’t mean I no longer doubt,

doubting myself and my motivations,

are very much, me.

It does mean,

 I trust myself more.


 enough navel gazing.

It occurs to me,

 I have not discussed,

 The Elements of Butch Style,

in a while.

One of the things you learn early,

in the Butch Handbook,

is a philosophical and attitudinal element,

one that is very hard to grasp and perfect,

it’s all about nuance.


Showing your femme you care,

with all the little things,

opening doors and pickle jars,

leaving love notes and taking out the garbage,

rubbing her feet and polishing her shoes,

learning about the things that interest her,

even if they involve,

 Opera and flower arranging:-)

Solicitude is not about loosing yourself,


 it is about taking care of her.

It is not about dominance,

 it is about tenderness.

Solicitude is a lifetime of tweaking.

It involves selflessness and altruism.

It is the true essence of butch.

It’s hard work being butch,


the rewards are tremendous.

**my cheek is hurting**

Flannel? At Christmas!!

It’s snowing,

really snowing.

From inside,

 it’s pretty.

Mom and I were mushing through it today.


Christmas is coming.

I can’t believe it but,

I’m not finished,


most of it is done,

I got my little nephew a fantastic t-shirt.

He is a cat freak,

but most cat stuff I find is geared to girls,

not that I approve of gender stereotyping

not, this t-shirt,

 my friends.

Black with an uber realistic drawing of a cat,

wearing an astronaut’s helmet.

He’s gonna freak with joy.

I know I did,

 and it was only ten bucks.

I would have got one myself but,

they only had them on the kids side.

Life is so unfair sometimes… 🙂

I settled for ordering a new Plaid flannel.

Dress flannel,

Christmas oblige.

No, No,

 even  I,

 don’t wear flannel at Christmas.

One of my few exceptions,

along with job interviews.

I usually do basic black,

channeling Johnny Cash,

except for my boots,

you all know I never do black boots.

I like a little bit of mismatching,

my nod to anarchy,

and style,

you got have style 🙂

Later girls


*The little guy is not my nephew, I have no brothers or sisters. He’s my cousins son, one of three and a little baby girl.

**Next post, books, I’ve been thinking of what to bring to the bunker.

Bitchin’ boots with a bitchin’ name

I’m feeling a little bit wonky, must be the full moon.


The weather, well you know,

 it’s the weather.

No hockey before Thursday night.

But, I don’t care,

I’m going out with my favorite drinking buddy.

Set up the pitchers barkeep.

I’ve had a rough week, but,

on a positive note,

 Blundstones have a new boot.

Crazy Horse Brown chisel toe,

in Nubuck.                       

Check it out,

are you drooling yet?

I know my fellow butches are and,

the femmes well,

you know it’s hot.


I’m talking myself into a pair as we speak.

On other fronts,

still plodding my way through My Year Of Meats,

very weird book,

 haven’t made up my mind if I like it yet.

But, you will all now by November 1st.

Just wanted to check in,

mostly to show you the boots.

Later girls


p. s  Cass, you know this title is for you  (wink, wink)

Fall, Butch Season?

It’s nippy but, blue skied.

Ah, Autumn.

I love it .

The air, the light.

The autumn afternoon sky,

 is the prettiest.

The air is crisp without being too cold.

The sky is blue,

 without the gray smog of Summer,

 or the white coldness of Winter.

Spring is the time of rebirth and awakening but,

in the city,

 it smells of melting dog poop,

also of Lilacs,



The decay of leaves smells nice,


Fall is quiet.

The wind carries loud voices away.

None of the spinning tires or agonising fan belts of Winter.

It could also be,

that Butch style is more appropriate to the Fall.

Boots, suede jackets and yes,

flannel shirts.

Cute scarves and baseball caps.

Butches look rad in the fall 🙂

Walking down the street keeping their girls warm.

Fall is definitely,

Butch season.

To all the Femmes out there,

if you don’t have one,

get yourselves a Butch.

‘Tis the season.

Tongue firmly planted in cheek.

Later girls


More Elements Of Butch Style

OK, I’m feeling a little bit off today.

It’s cloudy and cold.

The Canadiens lost their season opener,

to Toronto!

I’m still reading Coffee Will Make You Black by April Sinclair.

It’s a real gem.

A coming of age story.

I’ve always been a sucker for those.

I should finish this evening and give a full appreciation tomorrow.

So, to bring me out of my mini funk,

I thought I would have an installment of,

The Elements Of Butch Style.

I don’t quite know why but,

this always makes me feel better.

The last post on style was about shirts, Blundstones and Swatches.

Something I heard this weekend,

 in TO.

Set me to thinking.

“Well at least I don’t wear girl jeans!”

I have to confess something to you,

I wear girl jeans.

They are not exactly girlie but,

they are definitely girl jeans.

Let me explain,

I’m sort of short,

 and the fact of middle age spread,

 has made man jeans practically impossible.

They are just too long,

I would have to chop too much off the bottom.

A few years ago I resigned myself to nice stretch jeans

I mourned the studly 501’s of my twenties and,

 the sharp classic American sportswear Gap’s of my thirties.

It’s sad,


that’s life and aging,

at least I’m not wearing track suits!

These jeans,

in spite of being girl jeans,

are fine if accessorized properly

(Did I just say accessorize? How very Femme of me)

I was saying,

 with boots, boxers and a good hoodie,

 they will pass.

Next installment Boxers or Briefs?

Well, I better go before I loose all Butch credibility and,

 they revoke my man wallet

Later girls

Have fun