Sometimes, I just don’t know

Hello all,
hope you are well,
that wherever you are,
is warmer than here,
in the frigid,
beautiful ugly.

After a very warm spell,
a mini Spring.
It's gone,
cold,
again.
Oh well, 
it's early March.
Not an easy time,
physically or emotionally.

The week started out,
well,
I was feeling good,
the anniversary of my surgery,
was positive,
my life has so drastically,
improved,
I felt things were good,
I am exploring,
the political me,
the spiritual me.
I felt,
that I had become,
more receptive,
to other people,
their feelings,
their dreams.

I don't think,
I was looking,
with an observant,
eye,
listening,
with an attentive,
ear.

This week,
I have failed to understand,
two of the most important,
people in my life.
I have misinterpreted,
and sent mixed signals,
it has resulted in,
hurt feelings,
on all sides,
it has resulted,
in,
the necessity,
to explain,
to hash out.

Not good.

I suppose,
most of us,
feel misunderstood,
sometimes, 
lots of times.

I am a word person,
it is hard for me,
when my words are,
misunderstood,
I reach for the right,
words.
Words,
are essential to me,
but,
they often,
fail me,
do not convey,
the emotion,
behind my emotions.

Pain and frustration,
can come off as anger,
worry as dismissiveness,
concern as impatience.

I need to work on being,
better at explaining,
my words,
my thoughts,
my feelings,
my self.

I need to work at listening,
better.
I need to open,
my ears,
my mind,
my heart,
more.

Life is a work in progress.

Whenever, there is misunderstanding,
about words,
this old song,
comes back to me:

Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood
Baby, do you understand me now?
Sometimes I feel a little mad
But don’t you know that no one alive can always be an angel
When things go wrong I feel real bad.
I’m just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood
Baby, sometimes I’m so carefree
With a joy that’s hard to hide
And sometimes it seems that, all I have to do is worry
And then you’re bound to see my other side
I’m just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood
If I seem edgy, I want you to know,
That I never mean to take it out on you
Life has its problems, and I get my share,
And that’s one thing I never mean to do
Cause I love you,
Oh,
Oh, oh, oh, baby – don’t you know I’m human
I have thoughts like any other one
I keep working on it.

I apologize for the,

difficultness,

that is,

sometimes,

me.

Be well you all

Later girls,

BB

Published by

Bookish Butch

I am a bookish butch in my very early fifties. I live in Montréal and always have. I used to run a small used bookstore. Reading keeps me sane. My latest jiggie is photography, book project in the works, living the dream

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