Why do I feel lonely?

Hello ladies and a few gents,
hope you are all well,
happy, healthy,
basking,
in blue skies and,
Fall colours.
Hands down Fall is,
the handsomest season.
I don't even think that can,
be disputed.
:-)

I've had a busy,
social calendar of late,
well, for me,
maybe not for some,
of you social butterflies.

Last week,
went to a birthday dinner,
for a new friend,
I know,
how often does that happen??


It was lovely, met some,
intelligent, stimulating, friendly people,
food was great too.
She is a kind and funny person,
my new friend,
she makes many sacrifices for,
her art,
I admire that,
I am no way near as disciplined.

This weekend, my cousin got married.
He is the youngest of the cousins,
and,
I am almost the oldest.
I graduated from high school,
the year he was born,
so.. big difference.
He is a good man,
and,
he has married a good woman.
Long life to their union,
to their love.

I took pictures,
I am quite happy with them.
You work with what you've got,
bad lighting, rain?
improvise:-)

I have a date for my surgery,
so that has me,
preoccupied,
I am reaching for Zen,
it is being allusive.

I guess what I am trying to say,
is,
it's Fall my favourite season,
lots of good social stuff,
work is fine,
I feel healthy,
but,
I'm lonely,
weird,
I'm not depressed,
I'm not bored,
I'm lonely,
lots of people,
in and around,
my life,
family, friends,
colleagues,
and still..
I am lonely,
maybe, I need to,
fill my life with,
more meaning,
be more involved,
work,
ideas,
creativity,
not sure.

Just thinking,
out loud,
wondering,
what you all think,
do you feel lonely?
even with people around,
do you search for meaning?

Maybe it's just,
the coming of Winter,
maybe it's just,
a need for physical,
closeness,
maybe I am just,
scared of the operation,
maybe it's nothing,
a good walk and egg sandwich,
can't fix.

Maybe I need to breathe and feel,
not think so much.

Fresh air and bright colours,
here I come

be well, you all,
Later girls,
BB

Author: Bookish Butch

I am a bookish butch in my mid early fifties. I live in Montréal and always have. I used to run a small used bookstore. Reading keeps me sane. My latest jiggie is photography, book project in the works, living the dream

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