The older you get, the more you become, aware of the passage, of, time, of the past, personal past, collective past.
As an only child, raised by very intelligent, and, aware individuals, I always felt, a little bit, older. My conversations, from a young age, were with, adults, smart and kind adults, but, adults.
I talked, pretty much before, I did anything else, and, like most of my generation, I was raised playing outside, biking, and, Summer camp, and, always, TV. Much maligning of TV, by many people, but, television taught me, so much, about everything, of course books, but, they came a little later, TV, was there from the first. Television, today, is very different, lots of choice, lots of crap, also, lots of quality entertainment. It is no longer, consumed, in the same way.
As a kid, we watched TV, as a family, which meant, we watched what, my dad thought was best. Hockey was on Saturday nights. But, on Saturday and Sunday mornings, the TV was all mine, so cartoons, and, on Sunday, American preachers, quite the education. One thing we always watched, before the advent of VCRs and DVD, was movies, in French, in English, with subtitles, we were, all of us, movie junkies. In my teen age years, and, later, well into, early adulthood, I was obsessed with, old black and white, films, screwball comedies, and, drama, always, drama. For a while I wanted to be, an actress, ridiculous, but, it was an obsession like any other. I read tons, about movies: biography, histories, about the studio system, and stars, and later, criticism and film theory, movies, are one of my great loves.
So old sitcoms, on TV, and, black and white film, were a big part, of my culture, Both taught me, and, sparked interests in, history, literature, they taught me about, the use of language, timing, style. They gave image, texture, to my dreams.
On the same day, this week, we lost two representatives, of both those genres. The great Robin Williams, who was so smart, and so funny, who made you laugh, and, think so fast, you missed half the jokes, because, really, who could catch everything, that came out of him? Lovely, crazy, outrageous man. Like many comics, he was very smart, and, troubled. His performances in, Dead Poets Society, and, Good Will Hunting, touching, human, and, also, funny, he couldn’t help himself. I knew Williams, since Mork, and, I had never seen a comic like him. His passing is very sad, not surprising, he felt very deeply, that much was obvious.
Practically at the same time, we learned of the passing, of, Lauren Bacall. I loved Lauren Bacall. She was so sexy, smart, smoky, take no prisoners, kind of woman, you believed she was, woman enough, for Bogart.
I confess, I had a thing for her, could see myself, trying to woo her, silly, young butch fantasies. I read her book, By Myself, a good read, from all points of view, growing up, in a single parent home, growing up Jewish, poor, and falling in love, with a much older married co-star, raising children pretty much, on her own, excellent read, one of my favourite, Hollywood autobiographies. But, it is the Bacall after Bogart, I find most appealing, a mature, still young woman, great strength, great poise, she lived a nice long life. May she rest in peace.
In a way, losing, Williams, and, Bacall, is losing a part, of my past, both personal and collective. I did not know, these people and yet, I did. Sad to lose them, glad I knew them.
Later girls, BB