Is gallantry macho?

Gallantry: n. Bravery, chivalrousness; fine looking: gallant attentive to women, politely amorous-gallant : suitor; lover; man of fashion v/t escort; flirt with; play the gallant.

Chivalrous: adj. protecting the weak and oppressed; gallant, brave; courteous and protective esp. to women; of chivalry or knighthood.

I was outside,

the bookstore,

this morning,

lovely,

mild,

pretty light.

I was leaning,

on the,

parking meter,

with my sleeves,

pushed up,

trying to,

get some,

colour,

on my,

pale arms.

My bookstore is,

on a busy,

city street,

it’s not,

Ste-Catherine,

but,

we get traffic.

So,

this older lady,

was going to cross,

the street,

at the corner,

when a SUV,

came up to,

the stop sign,

well, it’s Québec, so it says Arret, but, I digress:-)

He stopped,

and,

waited,

even motioned,

with his hand,

for her to,

proceed,

she shook,

her head,

vigorously,

No,

with a frown,

on her face.

He looked at her,

with,

perplexity,

which,

soon,

turned to,

anger,

and,

then,

he gunned,

his truck,

down the street.

I don’t want,

to read,

too much,

into it,

but…

it,

struck me,

as,

sad.

I realise,

the lady,

is a weary,

city dweller,

who doesn’t,

move,

as quickly,

as,

she used to,

and she’s,

probably had,

a few,

hairy,

experiences,

But…

this man was being,

considerate,

polite,

trying to be,

a gentleman.

A missed opportunity,

for both of them,

to feel,

a tiny bit,

better,

about themselves,

and the,

world.

Hmm…

If,

civility,

and,

everyday,

garden variety,

politeness,

are,

qualities,

which,

are,

wanning,

what of,

gallantry?

chivalrousness?

That’s what,

came to mind.

A while ago,

I wrote,

a column,

about,

butch bachelorhood,

in which,

I wondered,

what,

women,

want.

My friend,

busy writer,

who is always,

kind about,

my writings,

offered some,

constructive,

criticism,

in the form,

of a series,

of questions,

I might ask,

myself,

in order,

to get,

a better handle,

on my subject,

in the future,

making it,

tighter,

grittier,

and,

knowing,

my friend,

a tad more,

controversial,

one question,

that really,

got me fired up,

Do you only open doors for cute women?

I know she was teasing and trying to get my goat, and perhaps provoke a tirade, that would lead to a good column and maybe, ultimately, it will.

My first reaction,

was,

Of course, not!!

and,

I thought about it,

and,

still,

of course not.

I open doors for all,

women,

even,

an occasional man:-)

You see girls,

I believe,

in,

gallantry,

and in,

chivalry.

I aspire to be,

Gentleman Butch:-)

I’m not sure,

I always,

succeed,

but,

I try.

Obviously,

civility,

and politeness,

should go without,

saying,

in a civilised,

society.

But,

are gallantry,

and,

chivalrousness,

considered,

old-fashioned?

anachronistic?

patronising?

sexist?

I mean is it wrong,

to want,

to help,

a woman with,

her coat?

door?

packages?

Does it in any way,

dimisnish her?

Does she see it,

as a,

put down?

as a,

come on?

I love independent,

women,

and,

I like to hold,

the door for them,

and say,

“after you”

What do you think?

Is gallantry macho?

<wink>

Later girls,

BB

Published by

Bookish Butch

I am a bookish butch in my very early fifties. I live in Montréal and always have. I used to run a small used bookstore. Reading keeps me sane. My latest jiggie is photography, book project in the works, living the dream

2 thoughts on “Is gallantry macho?”

  1. At first it seemed to me that even the most emancipated, independent woman would (should?) graciously accept a handsome butch opening a door for her or offering a hand with her heavy load. And even the most liberated woman should (would?) offer a smile or a thank you in return.

    But then your question spun around in my head. Maybe a strong, independent, emancipated woman would only accept that kind of chivalry from a handsome butch?

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